His name is Paul

Posted: August 25, 2012 by chocolatesandmedicines in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , ,

 

So I am here, falling in love with the most unexpected person.

 

His name is Paul. He looks really beautiful inside and out, he’s 5’11” tall, and has no facial hair. His eyes are in its most charming form, talking to me and listening sincerely. His hands were so clean and his touch is gentle enough to make me fall in love.

But I believe in what other people say. One couldn’t have it ALL.

Paul is a really great man. I can really tell you that it is a fact. He’s not that rich, not so poor, he looks good and clean and he can make me laugh and really happy in every minute. We have small fights about small things and make-up. I THINK We make a good couple.

 

He loves me. I know that because he showed me.

 

Paul is not perfect although he looks like an angel.. a perfect angel disguised as a man falling in love with me.

But yes, Paul has flaws.

 

I am in love with a man who sells sex. It is his sideline job.

Yes. I knew it from the start..

 

I am one dumb girl, I know. This stupid feeling never dies.

He told me not to fall in love but my inner goddess can’t help it. I love Paul. The worst part is he needs it. HE NEEDS IT.. And I forgot the fact that he loves me as a friend only. That he can’t commit t anyone. That he’s afraid to lose someone so he won’t even try to get someone.

It’s harder than anyone could ever imagine. It’s hard that I am in love with a man who had several women on different beds. A man who gave pleasure to different types of girls. It’s painful that I fell in love with a man who can’t love me the way I can love him.

 

I know that he loves me as a friend and I know that I can still handle this pain by trying to forget.

But is time enough for me to forget and have myself healed?

Is love enough for me to understand?

I hope so.

 

I know, God and time will provide. I know that Paul did this to avoid hurting me and I guess this time, goodbyes are good.

 

I love you, Paul.

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